GAMES 3-5: Bitter Herbs

April 8: Cubs 11, Astros 6
April 10: Cardinals 5, Astros 3
April 11: Cardinals 11, Astros 2

My favorite of the symbolic foods on the Pesach seder plate is the maror, or bitter herb. This vegetable may be horseradish, endive, chervil, or even romaine - any herbaceous food with a bitter flavor. One of the characteristics of the maror is that it might initially taste sweet, before one chews it, breaking down the cell walls to release the bitterness, which may range from mild (romaine) to blow-your-head-off (horseradish). The rabbis compare this to our ancestors' experience in Egypt, which at first was pleasant before enslavement made it harsh and bitter.

I, of course, find a parallel in Astros baseball. My younger son, who has a fantasy baseball team, arrived on Thursday with the news that Astros players had hit 5 homers in the game Wednesday night. Sweet. Since I was in the first day of my Passover-induced baseball isolation, I did not actually know the outcome of the game until one of my seder guests arrived with the sports section of the Post. Bitter: The five dingers accounted for the Astros' 6 runs, but the game was long-since lost on Brian Moehler's early inning meltdown. Moehler's first start was a polar opposite of his Spring Training prep - he gave up 5 runs on 8 hits in 1 2/3 innings. He left a pair of base runners for replacement Russ Ortiz, whose first pitch went over the wall to add another 2 ERs on Moehler's debit card. Five home runs later, the Astros had still not made up for that start.

I had planned, in my last blog, to spend Saturday night, after the Sabbath, watching all of the games I'd missed for holiday/Sabbath observance. But when I went online at 8:30 last night, I saw that the other two games were just more maror. Friday night, Mike Hampton had a lukewarm start in his Astros' homecoming against the Cards, while the lineup piddled away precious opportunities to score.

Saturday afternoon, Oswalt was slammed. His fifth inning was capped by Pujols' grand slam, leaving the Astros in the hole 6-0. The relievers jumped on the bandwagon - Wesley Wright, who didn't give away anything in the Spring, allowed 4 runs in his inning on the mound, including another homer to Pujols.LaTroy Hawkins added one for good measure. Meanwhile, the Astros lineup forgot how to score until the last inning, when they eked out a couple of runs. Thus they avoided that other seder plate symbol: The Egg.

Faced with all these bitter scores, I was perplexed about which of these games to watch first. In the end I opted to skip them all and go to bed early.

To recap a few highs and lows of the games I missed and the season so far...

Highs: The five home runs on Wednesday were hit by Matsui, Keppinger, Berkman, Pence, and Pudge. The new guy Keppinger is hitting .571 with 1.00 slugging. Pence is hitting .368 with .737 slugging, on a pair of home runs. Lee, who didn't hit all spring, went 3 for 4 with a homer on Friday night. Blum, who's getting about 2/3 of the playing time at 3B so far, is hitting over .400.

Lows: Brocail - who gave up a home run on Wednesday and then another run on a hit and three walks Friday - turns out to be injured with a right rotator cuff strain. He's day to day. After the first nine position players (counting both Blum and Kepp), the rest of the team has a batting average of .000 on 10 non-pitcher at bats. In the first 5 games, the starting rotation has allowed 23 ERs in less than 30 innings - that includes two appearances of our ace, and one relief appearance by Ortiz. Ouch - do the math. When you take out Wandy (1 ER in 6 innings), it's even worse. One week into the season, none of the starting pitchers has a win yet. Brocail, who has the only win, threw only 2 pitches in that game. Valverde has only appeared in one game.

I should review the statistics on how the Astros do when I'm watching live and when, due to Sabbath and holidays and work-day afternoon games, I have to miss them. It always seems to me (a highly unscientific statistical measure) that the Astros disproportionately lose these games. Unfortunately, after today's games, I will not get to watch a live game for the rest of the week due to a day game, an off-day, the end of Passover, and then the Sabbath. Wah.

This afternoon, Wandy returns to the mound to turn the tide - or to split the Cardinal Red Sea, sticking with my slightly forced Passover motif. I'm still betting on Wandy: This is finally going to be his career year.